Thursday, 29 October 2020

Bath



I'm still trying to make sense about what happened in our hotel room in Bath. I'm very sceptical about ghosts, there is always a logical explanation for those clicks and clangs and wailing sounds in the middle of the night, but there are some things that defy explanation. I was admiring myself in the floor length cheval mirror situated in the hallway opposite the bathroom door, when Carmen (or so I thought) brushed by without an excuse me, I turned to give her a brusque 'Charming!' only to cut myself off midway when I saw she was seated at a table, deeply engrossed on her ipad when I turned back to face the mirror, it had swung on its hinges and was facing the ceiling. 'Yes please, I'd love one' came the maid's reply. Like what? cried I. A cup of char, said the maid. Talk about keeping a dog and barking yourself,
feeling rattled and trying not to show it, I made tea, I also gave her a choice of the hotel's complementary biscuits, individually sealed for freshness, she opted for the Chocolate chip, I gave her the Viennese Swirls".

I was in fits at the decor. 

Oozing with style and elegance.

Rest assured dear readers, those beds were pulled well apart.
.

Who's a pretty boy then? 



Looks like a challenge.

Unable to recharge my cultural batteries in Benidorm amid the present difficulties, the maid and I decided to go away, down south, it made a pleasant change. 

Day 1. Stratford Upon Avon
Day 2. Bristol
Day 3. Weston Super Mare
Day 4. Bodmin
Day 5. Falmouth
Day 8. Bath
Day 9. Stratford
Back home.

16 comments:

  1. Always choose the choc chip. Viennese swirls stick to your teeth.

    That decor's reminiscent of something Liberace might do to an outhouse.

    Jx

    PS You heard the one about the gay ghosts, I'm sure: "They gave eachother the willies". Boom tish. [Blame Bobby Ball for that one. Well, he probably didn't tell it, but now he's dead it doesn't matter.]

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It was probably that 'chase me chase me' man during his performance as Buttons in Cinderella. I will always remember Bobby Ball as the swan man from Ilkley. I was giving myself the willies in that room.

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  2. You came down South?!!!! I could have made you tea!!! Ack. Next time. I could have put you up in a Yurt - an un-haunted yurt. I would have also leant you some wellies. Tsk.
    Meanwhile, the decor at your hotel is a little startling.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Does your Yurt come with a hot-tub? The room was stupefying, my maid is quite common she has been known to lick her knife at dinner and drop her aitches in polite company but she hardly ever swears, when she entered 'The Abbey' room she said Eff in ell, only she didn't say eff she said fuck.

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  3. Replies
    1. I remember going down for breakfast, the waitress asked us what room we were staying in, they go by names rather than numbers, I had no idea what it was called and neither did Carmen, so I told her, it's the one that looks like a whores' garret, she asked if I could narrow it down, she took my name and looked me up on her bit of paper and told me I was staying at the Abbey and raised her eyebrows.

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  4. That finish on the paint - a sort of satin-eggshell? - makes it look like the whole lower part of the room is coated in wipe-clean rubber, which means the "challenge" fits right in!

    (Although, at rist glance, I thought the challenge was just a fancy toilet brush & holder...)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. First glance. Not rist. Stupid fingers/keyboard...

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    2. I can give you the name of the hotel if you want, you can ask them about the paint, say you long for your home to be styled throughout in the same way as the Barbara Cartland suite, they'd be thrilled.

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  5. Happy Christmas!! Are you okay or are you still in a swanky hotel somewhere?
    Miss you.
    Sxxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for missing me! I've been feeling maungy (if that's a word) and full of self pity because I haven't had a foreign holiday in 9 months, I'd love to be in a swanky hotel somewhere, anywhere even a grotty B&B in Blackpool would seem like paradise. Too late to wish you a Happy Christmas but I hope you have a Happy New Year!

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    2. Still missing you!
      Wishing you a HAPPY NEW YEAR, and a foreign holiday in 2021.
      SXX

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    3. Me, too. Happy New Year, Mitzi!

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