I'll order some of this magic formula for Basil, my maid. She stands, sulking in a corner, with her hands in her knickers, and then when I summon her via the hand-bell, she holds her fingers in front her nose and says "uuuurrrggghhhh.... my hand stinks of fish fingers". Dirty bitch. I'm quite sure your Carmen would never behave in such a disgusting fashion, no?
I've banned Carmen from eating Scampi Fries in the house as the smell is absolutely horrendous and the same goes for rollmops, pilchards and sardines. During one of her feeding frenzies on board the Emerald Princess I sat and watched with morbid fascination as she sucked the brains out of a dozen prawns, she had a savage glint in her eyes and only paused from eating to wipe the dribble off her chin.
Carmen masturbates furiously over the Quaker Oats man. They are a worry.
I'll order some of this magic formula for Basil, my maid. She stands, sulking in a corner, with her hands in her knickers, and then when I summon her via the hand-bell, she holds her fingers in front her nose and says "uuuurrrggghhhh.... my hand stinks of fish fingers". Dirty bitch. I'm quite sure your Carmen would never behave in such a disgusting fashion, no?
ReplyDeletePS She frigs herself off every time the Captain Birdseye advert comes on the TV. She has a fetish for white-bearded men in their seventies.
ReplyDeleteI've banned Carmen from eating Scampi Fries in the house as the smell is absolutely horrendous and the same goes for rollmops, pilchards and sardines. During one of her feeding frenzies on board the Emerald Princess I sat and watched with morbid fascination as she sucked the brains out of a dozen prawns, she had a savage glint in her eyes and only paused from eating to wipe the dribble off her chin.
ReplyDeleteCarmen masturbates furiously over the Quaker Oats man. They are a worry.
I feel quite queasy now.
ReplyDeleteSX
Had planned smoked salmon for lunch.Might now have to reconsider...
ReplyDelete