Monday 25 March 2013

Customer Announcement

To the gentleman in the end cubicle in Meadowhall toilets at 13:07hrs. Your pretend cough, no matter how well timed, did not hide that enormous plopping sound coming from your cubicle, in future, do what I do and place a small wad of toilet paper in the bowl before you sit down and then wait until someone uses the hand drier before dropping a length. Thank you.
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10 comments:

  1. Ms Scarlet25 March 2013 at 20:05

    I concur. I always use the wad silencing method so as not to unduly disturb or offend my neighbours. All the best people do.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mitzi 26 March 2013 at 13:42

    Fuck the neighbours. I use the wad method to prevent splash back.

    ReplyDelete
  3. LẌ26 March 2013 at 13:55

    What bothers me more is the customers who don't wash their hands! That's why I hate to shake hands with others and quickly wash my hands as soon as possible afterwards if I do!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mitzi 26 March 2013 at 18:14

      It is a worry, and why is the water always cold in public toilets? I like to keep a bottle of alco gel close at hand.

      Delete
  4. Ms Scarlet26 March 2013 at 15:07

    Erm... if we ever meet, Mr Lax, please ask me to remove my gloves before shaking hands.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LẌ26 March 2013 at 15:14

      OK!

      Delete
    2. Ms Scarlet26 March 2013 at 15:36

      :-)
      Sx

      Delete
    3. Mitzi 26 March 2013 at 18:16

      You're just like the Queen, Scarlet. At the end of a busy day, shaking hands with the hoi polloi, do you take them off, hand them over to your lady in waiting and order her to burn them?

      Delete
    4. The Mistress1 April 2013 at 15:22

      I refuse to shake hands anymore.

      Needless to say, I'm not up for any promotions at work as a result of my standoffishness.

      Delete
  5. Unknown20 April 2013 at 12:05

    I'm afraid that is what happens when you allow working-class people to go to the toilet in places like Meadowhall. It is a filthy practice and should be banned outright.

    Of course, upper-class people don't practice this habit. When upper-class people go to the toilet, the result smells only of roses and lavender, and the plopping noise sounds more like a harp being strummed gently. x

    ReplyDelete

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