Thursday, 1 December 2016

Benidorm

I wanted a holiday filled with wonder, awe and excitement, I couldn't find one, so I went to Benidorm instead.
When travelling to foreign climes where mosquitos are rife, it is advisable to check under the rim of the toilet for mosquitos (a favourite lurking place of theirs). In one sitting alone I was bitten 3 times on my arse, with one bite just half an inch away from my nipsy, can you imagine that? The relief I got from sitting in a wicker chair, in a street café, gyrating my hips in a circular motion was that of pure ecstasy. I really went for it in the Ale-Hop shop and got stuck in with my hand for a good old scrat. When in Benidorm.


Some famous faces for you to marvel over.
Emily Bishop enjoying a fag and a pot of tea at the Belroy, the former Café de Paris.

Judi Dench showing off her tats and admiring a fine array of tat on display, she was a difficult one to photograph, too flighty.

Susan Boyle, enjoying a sedate plod around the old town.



A proper Spanish Costas song.

The Klaxons were a Belgian accordion based band who had a minor UK hit in 1983 with "The Clap Clap Sound", which reached number 45 in the charts.



12 comments:

  1. I wondered what had happened to Emily, I never believed for a minute that she'd really gone to Peru.
    Sx

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    1. Too right, Miss Scarlet.

      Who could give up living with Norris Cole?

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    2. Emily off to live in a commune in Peru, sounds like a plot from Acorn Antiques.

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  2. Emily Nugent, as was. Used t' work for that Swindley fella, right?

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    1. That's before my time, my first memory of Coronation Street was in colour, Fred Gee, Betty Turpin, Bet Lynch and the lake I was recently told that Mary in The Royale Family also played Concepta Regan in Coronation Street.

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  3. Oh! Nice beach! Looks like you and Carmen (Oi!, Scrubber!, Murgatroyd!, Heel!) had it mostly to yourselves!

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    1. It was fiesta week in Benidorm, the holiday makers had abandoned the beach for a fancy dress parade, sadly we were uninformed of the events taking place, otherwise I would have dressed up and showed them all how it's done.

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  4. To treat mosquito bites, I apply a soothing squirt of hot cheese with my Fondoodler.

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    1. Does it also treat chapped flanges?

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    2. Erm... a friend of mine was asking.

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  5. So glad you had good time. I just hope you didn't pick up that nasty Zika, I hear the toilet kind is the worst.

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    1. It is the worst kind Mr P, having a backside with three big oozing bites on it played havoc with my love life, it took 4 days to feel confident enough for a bit of bum fun with strangers.

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