Thursday 2 June 2016

Sitges

Welcome to the little Spanish town of Sitges where it is always circa 1976.




Taken from the balcony on the fourth floor with views overlooking the Church of Sant Bartomeu & Santa Tecla.

Just over the hill from the church and along San Sebastian Beach, you will arrive at Playa Nudista Cala Balmins, where the locals and tourists let it all hang out.




For those who enjoy sunbathing in the raw and exhibitionists too, this is the beach for you.

Enjoy a cafe con leche at the charming cafe montroig.

Cellulite? No, I've been sat on a wicker chair.

After my second cup of coffee I needed to 'spend a penny'. Whilst washing my hands at the sink, I heard grunting noises, I looked up in the mirror and saw the reflection of an old man, standing at the urinal spitting on his 'pecker' and masturbating furiously, I turned round to get a better look, as one does, he saw me looking, stopped masturbating placed both hands on his hips and started to thrust the air in my direction saying 'si...si'. I flew out of there clinging on to my mantilla for dear life, I've never seen the likes.

It all goes on in there!
Sitges is only 20 miles away from Barcelona. A 40 minute ride on the train takes you into the heart of Barcelona. One of my favourite cities and one of only a few places in the world where you could be shopping in Zara one minute and sipping sangria flaked out on the beach the next.
Lusting after this man on the beach, he could have taken me right there and then in full view of everyone including his wife, I wouldn't have cared less.



Lots of exotic seeds for sale on the Ramblas. Click on the pic to enlarge for a nice surprise or press Ctrl and the + button.


Live cacti in an inch high mug 4 for 10 euros or 3.50 each.
Ale-Hop (The shop with the cow outside). You find these are all over Spain, they sell everything from scarves, hats, bags, purses, jewellery through to 'sexy novelties', crockery, decorations, stationary and fridge magnets. Reasonably priced too.









Back in the hotel for a nice refreshing cup of Negro Tea.






Back Home

You've all heard of Tracey Emin's Unmade Bed. This is my contribution to the art world, entitled 'Suitcase Unpacked' yours for only 2.2 million any takers? The majority of my clothes were in the washer that small pile of clothes seen in the picture hadn't been worn! 







16 comments:

  1. I'm pretty sure one of those chaps in the first photo is called Georges. (No, I'm not saying more than that!)
    And what the heck is Whoopie Doo? Do I really want to know...
    Welcome back, by the way.Once you've done your ironing you can blog some more.

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    1. Thank you Dinah, I'm back under the slate sky of England. I'm still dousing myself in Malibu 30 as the smell is helping with the post holiday blues.

      I hope your George wasn't the one in the public toilet trying to get fresh with me.

      I like to finish my toilet duties with a Whoopie Doo flushable wet wipe, no skiddy worries for me, they're aimed for children really but I find the adult varieties can cause itching, you know, down there.

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    2. Top notch travelogue, Mitzi.

      "What the heck is Whoopie Doo?" was MY first question too.

      Flushable wet wipes cog up drains but I'll save that for one of my Public Service Announcements.

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    3. Thank you MJ I bet Judith Chalmers is shitting herself. Often in Spain they have little bins kept at the side of the toilet, filled with used toilet paper, it's disgusting, though in emergencies it does have it's uses. If there is no toilet paper you could sift through the bin and pick out the clean bits to use.

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  2. Oh, it looks fascinating and slightly weird, the way the best travel should.

    Were those top two in their fancy footwear chasing Carmen?

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    1. The top photograph sadly isn't one of mine, I nicked it off the internet. I thought it would make a good header.

      They wouldn't have had to chase her far, she isn't very good at running or saying no to strangers.

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  3. Crikey.... will I be able to grow a new pair of tits in my vegetable patch? (This sounds wrong on several levels).
    Sx

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    1. The titty melon has sadly been proved to be a hoax, they just grow to be ordinary melons and not titty shaped at all but the others are genuine.

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  4. Welcome back Mitzi !
    Strange customs in these foreign countries. Perhaps the old geezer was performing a traditional welcome dance or something ? And what strange vegetables they grow there.
    May I out of curiosity ask you an indescreet question, dearest Mitzi ? Why do you carry a syringe with you ?

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    1. Thank you kind sir. Very strange customs indeed, I had my bottom patted at the breakfast buffet by a big burly bear wearing a leather kilt. I just giggled coquettishly like you do, when your lost for words.

      It's a tooth whitening product called Zoom Nite White the only time I bleach my teeth is when I'm on holiday, I like to sit out in the sun with my gum trays in for 2 hrs a day, ideally to sleep overnight in them, though, how anyone can do that I don't know, I find it too painful, like a nagging toothache.

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    2. Very interesting stuff ! Thank you for the link Mitzi. Whiten and repair & protect at the same time - healthy drugs.
      I believe the bear found a nice pair to squeeze, the poor sod simply couldn't resist, how forgiveable !

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  5. I misread the title as "Stiges," thinking you and Carmen had both landed driving positions on the new Top Gear. Sorry.

    Lovely vacation pix. Did Carmen buy a little cactus?

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    1. It's pronounced 'Sidges' which is even more confusing. No Carmen didn't like the cactus she said they looked common, she's getting very uppity for a maid.

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  6. A lot of prescription drugs and a plastic lemon?

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    1. I don't take prescription drugs, those in the foreground are Asda's Selenium & Vitamins A, C and E next to those are SEROtin (got them off the internet) Formulated to Relieve anxiety, decrease stress symptoms, regulate sleep cycle and improve mood. Those in the white boxes are Dailies, contact lenses, a box of Paracetomol and a Jif lemon to lighten my hair and in an emergency it makes an ideal dildo.

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  7. I'll be sunning at Playa Nudista Cala Balmins. Bring some cash.

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