Wednesday 31 December 2014

Christmas Past

Well, that's another one over with. I hope you all had a fantastic Christmas, with lots to eat, drink and presents, talking of presents...

My maid of all work Carmen was absolutely thrilled to receive a Christmas present from me this year, it was a double pack of carbolic soap from Poundland she looked down at the gift that I held in my hand and with tears filling her eyes, she said, in a quivering little voice "A present... for me?" Yes Carmen, a present for you.  "you've spent a whole pound on...me?" Yes Carmen I did, you deserve every shilling. I gave her the receipt in case she wants to take them back to the shop in exchange for some other luxury. When she finally stopped sobbing, it was my turn, I held out my hands a foot width apart and closed my eyes, a small package was then placed in my left hand, trying hard not to let the disappointment show on my face, I opened my eyes and saw a small box wrapped in expensive looking paper. I eagerly ripped off the paper using nails and teeth and I was rewarded with a very small bottle of aftershave 50ml if you please! I didn't say anything but I was thinking it! The greedy bitch. Later on in the day I was going to surprise her with yet another little opener, a couple of satsumas from out the fruit bowl,



but I thought better of it, after the miserable disappointment I had in her gift, so I ate them myself. She knew I wanted a pair of slippers, the fluffy mules with the pink marabou trim I sometimes wear to greet the postman are looking a bit worse for wear, so I thought I'll go a bit butch with these. Oh well, I suppose I'll just have to buy them for myself.


13 comments:

  1. Very thoughtful to include the gift receipt!

    Happy New Year!

    PS: Were the satsumas seedless?

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    1. Happy New Year to you too LX!

      Yes the satsumas were seedless, I've just been inspecting the fruit bowl and I have noticed that quite a few of them are now wearing their winter coats! That's Morrisons' fruit and veg for you.

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  2. It was possibly the fumes from the carbolic making Carmen tear up... but how extravagant of you with gifts for the help.. My houseboys are lucky to get a new "soap on a rope" might add... that's to share between themselves.
    The slippers you are looking at are very butch darling... The postman will be pleased...

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    1. I'm just a naturally giving person Princess, it's a fault of mine. I've had seconds thoughts about those slippers, I was making merry with the Pernod and black last night and wasn't in the right frame of mine, they would look ghastly with my new stunning alpaca fur trimmed cape from Alpaca Annie

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  3. Happy New Year!!!
    Please tell Carmen that she is welcome to come and work for for me... especially on Christmas Day. I will treat her well... I can do better than a satsuma... I am generous... I can stretch to a Terry's Chocolate Orange... yes...I can see you raising a suitably impressed eyebrow at that offering. I will also allow her to dunk it.
    Sx

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    1. Happy New Year to you too Scarlet!

      *Raising eyebrow and pursing lips*

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  4. Alles Gute zum Neuen Jahr, Mitzi !

    Hope the aftershave does not burn.

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  5. 50ml of anything is always so disappointing. I spoil my maid with Dove on account of his soft, sensitive and milky skin.
    Have yourself a fabulous New Year. I'll have my face in the rum very soon and I may come out in time to see everyone else's fireworks going off.
    Happy New Year!
    xx

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    1. I use Dove too, it's gentle on the nipsy. Happy New Year!

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  6. Happy New Year, Mitzi. I adore the carbolic soap you gave to Carmen - I hope she uses it. My new maid of no work, Basil, would like to know if Carmen would be up for a meet for a bit of "how's your father"? Have a great 2015.

    Fanny xx

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    1. Happy New Year! Carmen is always up for a bit of slap and tickle, tickle and slap and a good fisting.

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  7. Oh, oh, this reminds my of something my dear friend Hyacinth B. told me, when she worked with Mrs. Councillor Nugent side by side at the charity shop. Mrs Councillor Nugent, as you well might know, is a pillar of the community, and said: 'You have to try to bring a little happiness into people's lives.' She let the nobility of these sentiments sink in for a moment before continuing. 'Not too much, mind you, or else they start taking it for granted. Next thing you know they're behaving in a disgusting manner and enjoying excessive romantic behaviour."
    Safe to keep that in mind when you spoil your Carmen next Christmas!

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